how to love a friend....?

A friend loves at all times,
And a brother is born for adversity.
~Proverbs 17:17

can you tell if a friend loves you? maybe when many of your friends get together and throw you a surprise on your birthday, or sing you a song and let the whole world know that you are important to them, or stay up with you all night because you have bunch of works to finish, or share with you their crazy lives but at the end encourages you that nothing is better than the grace and cross freely given by God, or pray for you continually, asking God to reveal His will to you.

recently, there were 2 particular friendships that has been bothering me. in both cases, the changes in friendship were caused by words/things that should not have been said in the first place. one happened a while back, which i believed was handled poorly due to immaturity, one just happened recently, and i believed it was handled much better simply because there were more time to think before responding to it. yet, both of them, at least to me, have hit the dead end. we dont and cant talk like we used to, or rather we dont talk with each other at all. in one case, even when we sit next to each other, no conversation started. how can relationship be so weak, that can be broken easily? how did it turn out to be like this, even when i thought everything has been reconciled?

whose fault is it? or does it matter whose fault is it? am i not loving my friends because i have not tried hard enough to restore the friendships? but at the same time, can i continue to love them even when we have hurt each other before? how do i love them when we dont even talk? does anyone have suggestions because im having a hard time showing love towards them....